Two of my kids play soccer, and it has surprised me how much joy I find sitting on the sidelines of a soccer field on a Saturday morning.

This year my son’s soccer coach would frequently shout, “Take your time buddy!  You’ve got plenty of time!”

It seemed like strange thing to say, because they clearly did not have plenty of time.  This isn’t Tiny Kickers anymore.  These kids are fast and competitive and good.  They are always a fraction of a second away from having the ball stolen, a goal shot, or a goal blocked.  It’s so fast.

But you can tell when they are rushing. You can tell when they are feeling the pressure and acting fast and not smart.  They make mistakes when they hurry, and they get sloppy.  There is barely any time, but there is enough time to think and to be intentional.

Somehow, his coach was coaching me.  Hearing “You’ve got plenty of time!” week after week really sunk in.  I started realizing how often I say, “Hurry up!”

I mean, of course I do.  I hate being late and instead of three french hens, two turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree, I  have three kids, a dog, and a husband with ADHD.  No matter how much I plan ahead and try and stay on top of things, we are often rushing.  Life is fast.

But I’ve noticed that things take longer when I am rushing.  My middle child in particular seems to have a dramatic fight or flight response to the phrase “hurry up,” because when I say it she runs the wrong direction and forgets how to put her shoes on.  I start making mistakes.  I spill my coffee, can’t find my keys, or snap at my husband, which I then have to apologize for later.  It’s possible that hurrying actually takes more time.

Telling my family to hurry up doesn’t get us where we are going any faster, and telling myself to hurry up doesn’t get me there any faster either.  It makes us feel rushed and hurried and anxious and grumpy.  We get sloppy and grumpy and make mistakes.

I truly don’t believe rushing gets us anywhere faster, but even if it did, I wonder if it’s worth the cost.  I grew up with a mentor who often said, “If you’re early you’re on time, if you’re on time you’re late, and if you’re late, you’re dead.”  I know it was hyperbole, but I have decided to respectfully disagree.

I would rather be a few minutes late and arrive feeling connected to myself and my family.  I would rather be a few minutes late and skip the rushing, spilling, and fighting.

I’m not just talking about being late or on time.  I’m talking about the attitude of haste that feels like it’s everywhere, especially this time of year.  To do lists are extra long, schedules are extra packed, and expectations are extra high.

We are hurried and rushed, and it takes us out of the moments we want to be in.  Flipping our mentality may require a change in scheduling and commitments, but more often I think it just requires a change in intention.  We need to remember that there is plenty of time, that what needs to happen will happen, that things that don’t happen are not catastrophes.

We can be late.  Our cookies can be store-bought.  Our presents can be sloppily wrapped or shoved into bags.  We can miss things.  We can do fun things we didn’t even plan on doing.  We don’t have to hurry, we don’t have to rush.  There is plenty of time for the important things.

I’m going to try to ban the word “hurry” from my vocabulary, both in what I say to others and in what I say to myself.

Take a deep breath.  There is plenty of time.